We’ve all been there. Whether it’s a slippery phone to the face or stepping on that godforsaken musical bear that doesn’t have an off switch, most seasoned parents have a story about the time they accidentally woke up their baby.
Here are 17 sleep catastrophes that are as hilariously painful to read as they are relatable.
Mistakes Were Made
- walking on tip toes to get my phone back from her room: big toe cracks LOUD
- the oh so classic can’t hold the sneeze, but also the dreaded fart
- having the Hue light remote in my pocket, getting up to get her in her crib, click bright lights everywhere
- stuck a note outside that says “don’t press the bell, baby sleeps, thanks” aaaand… Pressing the tape right on the bell
- phone on mute: check. But have I muted the sound of the media? NOPE. u/HolidaySad
Put her down because she was crying so much and I was getting frustrated, left her for about 5 mins so I could recompose myself. She started falling asleep and I felt so guilty for letting her cry herself to sleep that I picked her back up. Cue more crying. –u/lululobster11
Took a picture of my baby peacefully sleeping at night… And the flash went off right in her face. -u/Meerkatsastan
Whip It Real Good
Lay baby delicately in crib, which involves me leaning down. As I’m leaning, my long braid sneaks forward from behind my back and whips my baby across the face. -u/LampGrass
Natural (Door) Disaster
We have a tornado siren right outside our apartment complex, and if you live in the south you know how terrifyingly loud they are. City decides to test it out and she sleeps right through it. I get worried that she’s so quiet in her crib through all that racket, so I go into the bedroom to check on her. The door creaked and woke her up. -u/PhoenixLites
Snap To It
Slowly and quietly snapping my nursing bra on from across the room. -u/CrowleyJyn
I laughed out loud at a possum meme.
Earth Shattering Update
We have a camera in the twins’ rooms. After putting both babies to sleep with great difficulty I snuck off to watch them from the camera app on my phone. It shows there is a software update.
In all my wisdom I hit “ok”. It updates for a second then the CAMERA ITSELF that is hanging over the babies, speaks in the loudest earth shattering voice to tell us all, presumably that the update is complete. I don’t know what it said because it’s in Chinese. Of course cue both babies starting to wail as I rush into their room to stomp the camera to death, whisper yelling “fck fck fck!!”.. – u/eye_snap
Trying to pull a piece of my stray hair off the back of his shirt and accidentally tugging HIS hair. Lol same color ???? – u/csteinbrecher
50% Off, 100% Wrong
Smarthome tech is amazing and also the root of all evil. Tried to turn on the light in our bedroom. Alexa turns on every single smart light in the house, including in the nursery. Asked Alexa to turn on lights to 50%. Suddenly, 50 Cent is playing on every echo speaker in the house, including in the nursery. – u/puresunlight
Whale, That’s Not Right
Kiddo’s a month old. One morning I asked Google to play ocean sounds at 25% volume so we can sleep.
Responds at 80%, “Okay, playing Ocean Man but every word is in alphabetic order” – u/Scarletuba
Got Your Nose
Trying to pick the dummy/paci up and pop it back in quickly and pulling his nose instead. It was dark and I was so sleep deprived! – u/Vegetable-Tension-88
I stood at the side of her crib, barefoot on the wood floor, for like an hour, patting her back so she would fall asleep. Went to walk away and my foot made this loud af sound peeling off the floor. Somehow she slept through that, but when I went to put my weight on the next step, my other leg was absolutely dead numb from standing in the same position and I collapsed like a sack of bricks. That woke her up. – u/itsjustcindy
Crying Over Spilt Milk
Using Freemie pump cups after she has nursed herself to sleep, taking one off when full, dog stepping on my foot (150lbs of weight), and me dropping the cup full of milk on her head. We both cried. – u/Troggles86
Not A Ninja
Today I was tip toeing with my 4yo through the room while 9mo was sleeping. I turn to 4yo and whisper “ninja feet!” bc despite being a small child she walks like a hippo. As I say this, I trip over the cord to the charging vacuum, crash into the dresser, knock a bunch of shit down, and send the vacuum crashing into the lamp, which also fell down. Needless to say, that was the end of that nap ???? followed by 4yo: “uh mom, that wasn’t ninja feet” – u/plumsandporkchops
Highway To Hell
Partner walked down our hallway eating potato chips. – u/Whiasco
Took a deep breath – u/zadoo7
Have you ever woken your baby up doing something stupid?
Share your story in the comments so we can keep this trainwreck going.
Our next reco: Funniest Things People Have Said While Giving Birth